Thursday, September 6, 2007

New Obsession

Yesterday, I was having a small pity party for myself because my Big Girl, the one that I thought was now doing okay with her transition to a new school, drew me a picture of a sad little girl standing under a tree with a tear sliding down her cheek. She was the girl, and her name was Lonely. The title of the picture? Sadness Is in the Air.

You can imagine how this bothered me tremendously. Add the fact that our neighbor girl wasn't on the bus yesterday morning (which always bums her out), and I was feeling pretty emotional. Yes, I kept saying to myself what Big Girl's teacher told me give her the wings, but she has to fly. This may be true, but it still breaks my heart. I know that when she is at school she has fun and is doing well. Mostly, I suspect she misses me during the day. She mentioned this when I asked her why she was lonely in the picture, and some of the dramatics exist to get attention from Mom. And of course I know that we all need to be patient. We may be enjoying ourselves tremendously up here in the fort, but still, there are times when my heart strings are tugged at a bit. I miss seeing people from "home" regularly, but I also miss random things, and I suspect she does as well. I would say that at this point, it appears as if she is happy and worry-free about the move 90% of the time. The other 10% breaks my heart.

All day yesterday, until I saw her again, I felt the way a mom feels when you drop your toddler off at preschool or take them to the church nursery and they scream as you leave. Deep down inside, you know this is good for them and that they have to be independent, even if it's only just a bit because they are small. You know they will be okay, but it still hurts. And yesterday, I was melancholy, worrying about her because you know, well, that's my job. So, of course, I headed straight to the one place on this planet that can soothe me in a way no other place can ...


And I bought myself a treat because I deserved it. Right? I was emotional and needed help, so I purchased a bag of Sun Chips and the first season of Friday Night Lights on DVD, all for myself! Big Girl ended up just fine when she came home, so after I got her and the Little Man into bed, I watched four episodes, and now I'm obsessed! It is so, so, soooooo good. Seriously, I'm more excited about this show than I am Grey's Anatomy, and that's definitely saying something. I want to loan out my DVDs to all my friends so they can catch up and watch it with me. Even if they are a season behind, I'm going to recommend it to everyone. It's a great, great show.

My Little Man continues to do very well at preschool. He loves his teacher and the hermit crabs in his classroom. His teachers tell me every day how well he is doing, how nice he is to the other kids, how he makes up and sings songs for everyone, and how he loves to do the "waterfalls" project. The best part for me is that I work there, and I get to watch him out the window every day when he is at recess. It's so fun to watch him play in the little house as he marches in and out the door. He loves to open the shutters and stick his head in and out, but mostly, he walks around at recess picking flowers. For me. :) Every day I get a new bundle of beautiful weeds and the biggest hug when we reunite. I can't believe how much he has grown up. It's fun, but if I had my way, he would stay just the same as he is right now.

The Stephenie Meyer book signing is just four days away! WAHOO! The only problem is that our "Bite Me" t-shirts have not arrived. This means that we're going to have to be creative and make some which is quite stressful. I've seen the pictures of other fans at her signings, and they all have very cool shirts with original designs. This is something I do not specialize in. Evidence of this exists in our hall closet, where my 7th grade cheerleading sweatshirt is hanging. We found it when we moved, and I couldn't get rid of it. It smells like dust and mildew, but that can't disguise the fact that it is plain and boring. Granted, there were five of us who designed the sweatshirt, but still, I was in on the plan. And it is white, saying our names, our school, and our grade in block letters. Very boring, I assure you. Of course this was a long time ago, but my clothing design skills have not improved in the long time span between 7th grade and now. What can I create to show my undying love and devotion for my favorite little vampire? I'm stressed! Not really, but I do want to have something fun. Perhaps I'll think of that today when I get my hair done!

Yes, it's true! I haven't visited a salon since April, and now I'm going to see Dean who is going to make me look like a supermodel. Okay, maybe not a supermodel, but at least I will hopefully come out looking better with my hair one color instead of like a skunk with bad roots.

What I'm reading: Looking for Alaska by John Green
Miles to run: Still haven't managed that. Hey, I wrote 8,230 words on Tuesday! Give me a break!

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